If I Were A Man, I'd Marry Me

If I Were A Man, I'd Marry Me

Book - 1999
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It's no understatement when the Atlanta Journal & Constitution calls P. S. Wall "Erma Bombeck with attitude." Who else but Wall could blithely recount flying first class next to a call girl and trying on her fifteen-hundred-dollar "chocolate for your feet" shoes? "Oooooh, yes!" Now, America's wry new humorist--whose award-winning newspaper column "Off the Wall" is syndicated nationwide--casts her penetrating eye on everything from felines to Elvis, dieting to weed whackers, country living to sexy French tour guides. With her innate irreverence and sharp-as-nails sense of humor, she raises ordinary life to fiercely funny new heights. Younger men: "If you fall in love with a younger guy, it's like trying to have a relationship with a jockey strap. There's just no give, and expansion is totally out of the question." Speeding:  "Traffic police are a mystery to me. As far as I'm concerned, it's just not natural for a guy to stop a woman for going too fast." Past loves: "Old lovers are like socks. They always show up full of static cling and missing their mate." Convictions: "There's nothing I hate more than having my convictions put to the test. That's why I try not to have any." Cars: "Buying a truck is like dating. If you're not careful, you'll end up paying for that test drive the rest of your life." Politics: "In our neck of the woods, 'politically correct' means mounting your Rush Limbaugh sticker on the right side of the bumper." There's just no stopping a woman with a "smart-aleck streak as wide as she claims her posterior to be." * Both acerbic and playful, If I Were A Man, I'd Marry Me is humor with a savvy sting. * Minneapolis Star Tribune
Publisher: New York : Ballantine Pub. Group, 1999.
ISBN: 9780345430328
Branch Call Number: Wal
Characteristics: 227 p.


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